A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."--Submitted by Cicec
"Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."-- Groucho Marx
Patient: Doctor, I think I'm a dog.Psychiatrist: Ah. Get onto the couch.
Patient: I'm not allowed.
Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging their right foot as they walk. As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points to his foot and says "Vietnam, 1969". The other points his thumb behind him and says, "Dog crap, 20 feet back".
Q: If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside?A: K9P.